okay, so wow… I almost didn't write anything for today!! I got so caught up with things.
Today, I packed up all of my stuff from San Francisco and moved over to my aunt's house on the other side of the Bay Bridge… I'll be living here most likely for the next 3 weeks.
This is another change that I am looking forward to and excited for- and also a bit apprehensive and unsure about. I have mixed feelings because, on one end, I have so many amazing projects and goals in life right now that I am actively pursuing… My acting classes with the Meisner Technique, a film project with a spiritual teacher/awaken-er hahah, another possible project with another awesome spiritual teacher/awaken-er, and also the space and time to take the opportunity to eat healthy, exercise and get outside regularly, and also be around family and loved ones. :)
On the other side, I am feeling nervous because I fear going back into my head, back into old routines and harmful patterns and ways of living… I don't know how to get around that.
But I will continuously practice all of the things that I know are good for me, and I know that these will continue shaping me, even when I feel nervous / unsure. At least I will continue building up a stronger and more healthy lifestyle. And I am so excited for the projects that are soon to begin. And to have a full kitchen to be using to prep food and a full house to live in. :) It's great in San Francisco, yet still feels so separate. Which I love- my room, bathroom, and fridge/microwave being downstairs and having that beneficial space- but also distances me from the family that I live with, and it's strange for me wanting to use the blender or kitchen since that means walking up the stairs outside. It just doesn't feel whole- it feels in parts. Which is why I feel that this time back at my aunt's will feel more wholesome. Less separateness and distance, but also more togetherness (in a good way) and more flexibility with what I do with my days. :)
I really want to use these three weeks to my best. I want to grow a healthy diet and lifestyle, and really see what I can do and how I can grow when I set myself free to explore and create. I want to just let go and let it be and see where life takes me. And have fun while doing so. :) I'll set myself free.
And what a perfect day/weekend to start this on: Valentine's! As my goal during my time here is to love myself and practice love at all times, as I said in yesterday's post. :) So we'll see how it goes.
Good night. i love you.